Season 3 · Tập 15

Kids, the spring of 2008 was a pretty great time for me.

/kɪdz/ /sprɪŋ/ /wɒz/ /ˈprɪti/ /ɡreɪt/ /taɪm/ /fɔːr/ /miː/

Stella and I had started dating,

/ænd/ /hæd/ /ˈdeɪtɪŋ/

and I'd just gotten a big raise at work,

/ænd/ /dʒʌst/ /bɪɡ/ /reɪz/ /wɜːrk/

so I decided to purchase something

/ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/

I knew it would be the envy of all my friends.

/njuː/ /ɪt/ /wʊd/ /biː/ /ɔːl/ /maɪ/ /frɛndz/

A new car!

/njuː/ /kɑːr/

Ted, this is New York City, you're never gonna drive it.

/ɪz/ /njuː/ /jɔːrk/ /ˈsɪt.i/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /draɪv/ /ɪt/

This is a really, really stupid purchase,

/ɪz/ /ˈrɪ.ə.li/ /ˈrɪ.ə.li/ /ˈstjuːpɪd/

and, and I'm sorry, but none of us can support it.

/ænd/ /ænd/ /ˈsɒr.i/ /bʌt/ /nʌn/ /ʌs/ /kæn/ /səˈpɔːrt/ /ɪt/

Shotgun for eternity!

/fɔːr/

- You can't call shotgun for eternity. - I just called it.

/juː/ /kɔːl/ /fɔːr/ /dʒʌst/ /ɪt/

You can't just call things, Barney.

/juː/ /dʒʌst/ /kɔːl/ /θɪŋz/

I call that I can call things!

/kɔːl/ /ðæt/ /kæn/ /kɔːl/ /θɪŋz/

Hey, baby.

/ˈbeɪbi/

Beer. Bia.

/bɪər/

Are you okay?

/juː/

Beer. Bia.

/bɪər/

Okay, what happened?

/wɒt/ /ˈhæpənd/

They always told me that...

/ðeɪ/ /ˈɔːl.weɪz/ /toʊld/ /miː/ /ðæt/

that working at a big law firm was like being at war.

/ðæt/ /ˈwɜːrkɪŋ/ /bɪɡ/ /lɔː/ /wɒz/ /laɪk/ /wɔːr/

You get out of law school, it's like getting out of boot camp.

/juː/ /ɡɛt/ /aʊt/ /lɔː/ /skuːl/ /laɪk/ /ˈɡɛtɪŋ/ /aʊt/

That first day at work, you're storming the beaches,

/ðæt/ /fɜːrst/ /deɪ/ /wɜːrk/

full of piss and vinegar...

/fʊl/ /ænd/ /ˈvɪnɪɡər/

- Dude, we're lawyers now. - Totally.

/naʊ/ /ˈtoʊtəli/

We've got briefcases and everything.

/ænd/ /ˈɛv.ri.θɪŋ/

Freakin' briefcases.

- You have anything in yours? - Totally empty. You?

/juː/ /hæv/ /ˈɛn.i.θɪŋ/ /jɔːrz/ /ˈtoʊtəli/ /ˈɛmpti/ /juː/

Candy bars.

Then you get in the trenches side by side with your buddies

/ðɛn/ /juː/ /ɡɛt/ /saɪd/ /saɪd/ /wɪð/ /jʊr/

and you feel a sense of camaraderie.

/ænd/ /juː/ /fiːl/ /sɛns/

But before too long...

/bʌt/ /bɪˈfɔːr/ /lɔːŋ/

Hey, Marshall.

...the shells start to fall.

/stɑːrt/ /fɔːl/

Hello, Arthur.

Arthur Hobbes is one of the senior partners at my firm, and

/ɪz/ /ˈsiːniər/ /maɪ/ /ænd/

he's... he's my boss.

/maɪ/ /bɔːs/

He seems like a nice guy, but he's got a nickname...

/hiː/ /laɪk/ /naɪs/ /ɡaɪ/ /bʌt/

Artillery Arthur.

How's your morning going?

/jʊr/ /ˈmɔːr.nɪŋ/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/

It's going fine, how is yours?

/ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/ /faɪn/ /haʊ/ /ɪz/ /jɔːrz/

Not too bad, not too bad.

/bæd/ /bæd/

Hey, is Ferguson in yet?

/ɪz/ /jɛt/

He is, he's in, just in his office next door.

/hiː/ /ɪz/ /dʒʌst/ /hɪz/ /ˈɒfɪs/ /nɛkst/ /dɔːr/

That's great. Have a good one, buddy.

/ɡreɪt/ /hæv/ /ɡʊd/ /ˈbʌdi/

You, too.

/juː/

You never know who's gonna get hit...

/juː/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /noʊ/ /ɡɛt/

Hey, Ferguson!

I read your report, and it's complete crap!

/riːd/ /jʊr/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/ /ænd/ /kəmˈpliːt/

No, you know what? That's an insult to crap.

/noʊ/ /juː/ /noʊ/ /wɒt/

If crap could eat and then crap stuff out, it's that!

/ɪf/ /kʊd/ /iːt/ /ænd/ /ðɛn/ /stʌf/ /aʊt/ /ðæt/

Your report is the crap that crap craps!

/jʊr/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/ /ɪz/ /ðæt/

If you last two more days here, I'll be shocked!

/ɪf/ /juː/ /læst/ /tuː/ /mɔːr/ /hɪr/ /biː/

Shocked!

It was brutal,

/ɪt/ /wɒz/

but the worst was a few minutes later.

/bʌt/ /wɜːrst/ /wɒz/ /fjuː/ /ˈleɪtər/

Did you hear that?

/dɪd/ /juː/ /hɪr/ /ðæt/

Yeah, sorry.

/ˈsɒr.i/

Can you believe he did that on Take Your Daughter to Work Day?

/kæn/ /juː/ /bɪˈliːv/ /hiː/ /dɪd/ /ðæt/ /ɒn/ /teɪk/ /jʊr/ /ˈdɔːtər/ /wɜːrk/ /deɪ/

So that brings us to today.

/ðæt/ /brɪŋz/ /ʌs/ /təˈdeɪ/

Oh, no.

/noʊ/

A little background. A little background.

/ˈlɪt.əl/ /ˈlɪt.əl/

So I'm working on this report called

/ˈwɜːrkɪŋ/ /ɒn/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/

"Using 23-b-3 Spurious Class Action Precedent to

/klæs/ /ˈæk.ʃən/

"Contest a Class Certification Order

/klæs/ /ˈɔːrdər/

Based On A Lack of Commonality, Numerosity..."

/ɒn/ /læk/

Dude, you lost us.

/juː/ /lɒst/ /ʌs/

Can't you just call it something cool like "the Ninja Report"?

/juː/ /dʒʌst/ /kɔːl/ /ɪt/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /kuːl/ /laɪk/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/

Okay. Yeah, fine, whatever.

/faɪn/

Um, so I'm supposed to turn in "the Ninja Report" yesterday.

/səˈpoʊzd/ /tɜːrn/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/ /ˈjɛs.tər.deɪ/

- Awesome. - Cool.

/ˈɔːsəm/ /kuːl/

But I got insanely busy with other stuff,

/bʌt/ /ˈbɪzi/ /wɪð/ /ˈʌð.ər/ /stʌf/

I didn't get a chance to finish it,

/ɡɛt/ /tʃæns/ /ˈfɪn.ɪʃ/ /ɪt/

and then this morning...

/ænd/ /ðɛn/ /ˈmɔːr.nɪŋ/

- Hey, Ferguson. - Hey, Arthur.

- How's your day going? - I gotta go.

/jʊr/ /deɪ/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/ /ɡoʊ/

- Great. How is yours? - Great, great.

/ɡreɪt/ /haʊ/ /ɪz/ /jɔːrz/ /ɡreɪt/ /ɡreɪt/

Hey, is Marshall in yet?

/ɪz/ /jɛt/

Oh, thank God.

Yeah, he's right in there.

/raɪt/ /ðɛr/

Fantastic. Have a good one, buddy.

/hæv/ /ɡʊd/ /ˈbʌdi/

And then...

/ænd/ /ðɛn/

He screamed at me.

/hiː/ /miː/

Oh, baby, I'm so sorry.

/ˈbeɪbi/ /ˈsɒr.i/

What, that's it?

/wɒt/ /ɪt/

You're upset because a guy talked loudly near you?

/ʌpˈsɛt/ /bɪˈkɔːz/ /ɡaɪ/ /nɪər/ /juː/

Barney, I have never been screamed at like that in my life.

/hæv/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /laɪk/ /ðæt/ /maɪ/ /laɪf/

Come on, when's the last time you got screamed at at work?

/kʌm/ /ɒn/ /læst/ /taɪm/ /juː/ /wɜːrk/

I got screamed at three times today.

/θriː/ /taɪmz/ /təˈdeɪ/

Once in Korean.

/wʌns/

This is corporate America, Marshall.

/ɪz/

Screaming is a motivational tool,

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /ɪz/

like christmas bonuses or sexual harassment.

/laɪk/ /ˈkrɪsməs/ /ˈsɛkʃuəl/

It's just good business.

/dʒʌst/ /ɡʊd/ /ˈbɪznɪs/

Oh, baby, it's just not fair.

/ˈbeɪbi/ /dʒʌst/ /fɛr/

You've been working so hard.

/ˈwɜːrkɪŋ/ /hɑːrd/

Late nights, weekends.

/leɪt/

I never see you.

/ˈnɛv.ər/ /siː/ /juː/

We've barely made love in weeks.

/lʌv/

It's bad, guys. Mama needs her sugar.

/bæd/ /ɡaɪz/ /ˈmɑːmə/ /hɜːr/ /ˈʃʊɡər/

Look, Marshall, he screamed at you, you took it.

/lʊk/ /hiː/ /juː/ /juː/ /tʊk/ /ɪt/

He probably respects you more for it.

/hiː/ /ˈprɒbəbli/ /juː/ /mɔːr/ /fɔːr/ /ɪt/

Yeah, about that...

/əˈbaʊt/ /ðæt/

So Arthur's busy giving me the full screaming treatment...

/ˈbɪzi/ /ˈɡɪvɪŋ/ /miː/ /fʊl/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /ˈtriːtmənt/

Face turning red,

/feɪs/ /rɛd/

vein in his forehead about to burst,

/hɪz/ /əˈbaʊt/

spittle flying like shrapnel.

/laɪk/

Everyone you work with walking by your office, peering in.

/ˈɛv.ri.wʌn/ /juː/ /wɜːrk/ /wɪð/ /jʊr/ /ˈɒfɪs/

And suddenly, I just felt all of it.

/ænd/ /ˈsʌd.ən.li/ /dʒʌst/ /fɛlt/ /ɔːl/ /ɪt/

All of what?

/ɔːl/ /wɒt/

All of it.

/ɔːl/ /ɪt/

The fact that I became a lawyer to save the environment,

/fækt/ /ðæt/ /ˈlɔːjər/ /seɪv/ /ɪnˈvaɪrənmənt/

end now I'm working for the bad guys instead.

/ɛnd/ /naʊ/ /ˈwɜːrkɪŋ/ /fɔːr/ /bæd/ /ɡaɪz/ /ɪnˈstɛd/

The fact that I am stuck in this job

/fækt/ /ðæt/ /stʌk/ /dʒɒb/

because of a mortgage I can barely afford

/bɪˈkɔːz/ /kæn/

on an apartment that is crooked.

/ɒn/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/ /ðæt/ /ɪz/

The fact that I am a grown man,

/fækt/ /ðæt/ /mæn/

and nobody, not even Artillery Arthur,

/ænd/ /ˈnoʊ.bɒd.i/ /ˈiːvən/

has the right to talk to me like that!

/hæz/ /raɪt/ /tɔːk/ /miː/ /laɪk/ /ðæt/

I begged my body not to do it.

/maɪ/ /ˈbɒdi/ /duː/ /ɪt/

But it was no use.

/bʌt/ /ɪt/ /wɒz/ /noʊ/ /juːz/

Oh, God,

I just... I just...

/dʒʌst/ /dʒʌst/

Just because you weren't around for this,

/dʒʌst/ /bɪˈkɔːz/ /juː/ /əˈraʊnd/ /fɔːr/

I called shotgun for all eternity in Ted's car.

/fɔːr/ /ɔːl/ /kɑːr/

How I Met Your Mother 3x15 - The Chain of Screaming - How I Met Your Mother 3x15 - The Chain of Screaming -

/haʊ/ /jʊr/ /ˈmʌð.ər/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /haʊ/ /jʊr/ /ˈmʌð.ər/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/

Dude, I can't believe you cried in front of your boss.

/bɪˈliːv/ /juː/ /jʊr/ /bɔːs/

I don't know what happened.

/noʊ/ /wɒt/ /ˈhæpənd/

There's just something about being yelled at like that,

/dʒʌst/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /əˈbaʊt/ /laɪk/ /ðæt/

like I was being scolded by my dad.

/laɪk/ /wɒz/ /maɪ/ /dæd/

Suddenly... suddenly I was a little boy.

/ˈsʌd.ən.li/ /ˈsʌd.ən.li/ /wɒz/ /ˈlɪt.əl/ /bɔɪ/

Is "boy" the right word?

/ɪz/ /bɔɪ/ /raɪt/ /wɜːrd/

I felt absolutely powerless.

/fɛlt/ /ˈæbsəluːtli/

Flaccid. Hell, I... I felt castrated.

/fɛlt/

God, you're hot right now.

/hɒt/ /raɪt/ /naʊ/

And the worst thing is, tomorrow morning I have to walk into Arthur's office

/ænd/ /wɜːrst/ /θɪŋ/ /ɪz/ /təˈmɒr.oʊ/ /ˈmɔːr.nɪŋ/ /hæv/ /wɔːk/ /ˈɒfɪs/

and give him the Ninja Report.

/ænd/ /ɡɪv/ /hɪm/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/

- Ooh. ooh. - Ninjas are cool.

/kuːl/

How the hell am I supposed to face this guy again?

/haʊ/ /səˈpoʊzd/ /feɪs/ /ɡaɪ/ /əˈɡɛn/

Here's what I would do if I were you.

/wɒt/ /wʊd/ /duː/ /ɪf/ /wɜːr/ /juː/

Hi, Arthur.

Hello, Marshall. Have you finally finished the Ninja Report?

/hæv/ /juː/ /ˈfaɪnəli/ /ˈfɪnɪʃt/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/

Yeah, I got it.

/ɪt/

Right here.

/raɪt/ /hɪr/

I think it's gonna blow you away.

/θɪŋk/ /juː/ /əˈweɪ/

Please, I have a family.

/pliːz/ /hæv/ /ˈfæm.ɪ.li/

So we good?

/wiː/ /ɡʊd/

We're so good.

/ɡʊd/

Then why are you still in my office?

/ðɛn/ /waɪ/ /juː/ /maɪ/ /ˈɒfɪs/

Okay, gun violence might be the answer to everything up in Canada, Robin,

/ɡʌn/ /maɪt/ /biː/ /ˈæn.sər/ /ˈɛv.ri.θɪŋ/ /ʌp/ /ˈkænədə/

but here in America, we solve our problems with words.

/bʌt/ /hɪr/ /wiː/ /sɒlv/ /aʊər/ /wɪð/ /wɜːrdz/

Marshall, you go in and you dazzle this guy

/juː/ /ɡoʊ/ /ænd/ /juː/ /ɡaɪ/

with a big eloquent speech defending human dignity.

/wɪð/ /bɪɡ/ /spiːtʃ/ /ˈhjuːmən/

Like Abraham Lincoln.

/laɪk/

Yeah, because it's so easy just to bust out

/bɪˈkɔːz/ /ˈiː.zi/ /dʒʌst/ /aʊt/

a big, eloquent speech off the top of your head.

/bɪɡ/ /spiːtʃ/ /ɒf/ /tɒp/ /jʊr/ /hɛd/

Observe.

- Arthur? - What do you want, Marshall?

/wɒt/ /duː/ /juː/ /wɒnt/

Justice, sir.

/ˈdʒʌstɪs/ /sɜːr/

You see, we are all born with certain incontrovertible rights,

/juː/ /siː/ /wiː/ /ɔːl/ /bɔːrn/ /wɪð/

the most fundamentally paramount of which is the right...

/moʊst/ /wɪtʃ/ /ɪz/ /raɪt/

Wait, you can't be fundamentally paramount.

/weɪt/ /juː/ /biː/

One means highest, one means lowest.

You are nailing this.

/juː/

Human beings have rights,

/ˈhjuːmən/ /hæv/

and those rights are, um...

/ænd/ /ðoʊz/

You got me hooked, reel me in.

/juː/ /miː/ /hʊkt/ /miː/

There are certain justices

/ðɛr/

that cannot or will not

/ðæt/ /wɪl/

be inalienable... as such...

/biː/ /sʌtʃ/

for the future.

/fɔːr/ /ˈfjuː.tʃər/

Stuck the landing... Bravo!

/stʌk/

Thank you.

/juː/

Security's gonna rough you up a bit on the way out.

/rʌf/ /juː/ /ʌp/ /ɒn/ /weɪ/ /aʊt/

Guys, guys, this is not helping, okay?

/ɡaɪz/ /ɡaɪz/ /ɪz/ /ˈhɛlpɪŋ/

I can't have some big confrontation with Arthur.

/hæv/ /sʌm/ /bɪɡ/ /wɪð/

I need this job, I... I need the money.

/niːd/ /dʒɒb/ /niːd/ /ˈmʌn.i/

Yeah, but how good would it feel to walk in there tomorrow,

/bʌt/ /haʊ/ /ɡʊd/ /wʊd/ /ɪt/ /fiːl/ /wɔːk/ /ðɛr/ /təˈmɒr.oʊ/

- tell him off and then quit? - It's great to fantasize about,

/tɛl/ /hɪm/ /ɒf/ /ænd/ /ðɛn/ /kwɪt/ /ɡreɪt/ /əˈbaʊt/

but nobody ever actually does it.

/bʌt/ /ˈnoʊ.bɒd.i/ /ˈɛv.ər/ /ˈæktʃuəli/ /dʌz/ /ɪt/

Gary Blauman did it.

/dɪd/ /ɪt/

Guy I used to work with, the guy's a legend now.

/ɡaɪ/ /wɜːrk/ /wɪð/ /ˈlɛdʒənd/ /naʊ/

We were at the morning meeting

/wiː/ /wɜːr/ /ˈmɔːr.nɪŋ/ /ˈmiːtɪŋ/

and old Blauman was getting reamed out but good.

/ænd/ /oʊld/ /wɒz/ /ˈɡɛtɪŋ/ /aʊt/ /bʌt/ /ɡʊd/

Pretty much routine at the morning meeting,

/ˈprɪti/ /mʌtʃ/ /ruːˈtiːn/ /ˈmɔːr.nɪŋ/ /ˈmiːtɪŋ/

but then, on this particular day, something amazing happened.

/bʌt/ /ðɛn/ /ɒn/ /pərˈtɪkjʊlər/ /deɪ/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /əˈmeɪzɪŋ/ /ˈhæpənd/

You made yourself look bad,

/juː/ /jɔːrˈsɛlf/ /lʊk/ /bæd/

you made this company look bad, and quite frankly,

/juː/ /ˈkʌmpəni/ /lʊk/ /bæd/ /ænd/ /kwaɪt/

you made our friends, the North Koreans, look bad!

/juː/ /aʊər/ /frɛndz/ /nɔːrθ/ /lʊk/ /bæd/

And I'll tell you something else, Blauman, if you think for one...

/ænd/ /tɛl/ /juː/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /ɛls/ /ɪf/ /juː/ /θɪŋk/ /fɔːr/

You know what, Bilson?

/juː/ /noʊ/ /wɒt/

You can kiss my ass.

/juː/ /kæn/ /kɪs/ /maɪ/

Oh, snap.

- What? - You heard me.

/wɒt/ /juː/ /hɜːrd/ /miː/

I don't need to take your crap anymore.

/niːd/ /teɪk/ /jʊr/ /ˌɛniˈmɔːr/

My cousin's website went public today,

/maɪ/ /ˈwɛbsaɪt/ /wɛnt/ /ˈpʌblɪk/ /təˈdeɪ/

and I made a pile of money on the IPO,

/ænd/ /ˈmʌn.i/ /ɒn/

so you know what I think of this whole damn company?

/juː/ /noʊ/ /wɒt/ /θɪŋk/ /hoʊl/ /ˈkʌmpəni/

- Oh, my God. - He peed on the conference table?

/maɪ/ /hiː/ /ɒn/ /ˈkɒnfərəns/ /ˈteɪ.bəl/

Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on...

/kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/

Uh, look, could you guys just...

/lʊk/ /kʊd/ /juː/ /ɡaɪz/ /dʒʌst/

look away for a second till I get started?

/lʊk/ /əˈweɪ/ /fɔːr/ /ˈsɛk.ənd/ /ɡɛt/

Come on.

/kʌm/ /ɒn/

Does this help?

/dʌz/ /hɛlp/

Eventually, he just gave up and left.

/hiː/ /dʒʌst/ /ɡeɪv/ /ʌp/ /ænd/ /lɛft/

And then his cousin's website tanked.

/ænd/ /ðɛn/ /hɪz/ /ˈwɛbsaɪt/

And then he became a janitor at an old folks' home

/ænd/ /ðɛn/ /hiː/ /oʊld/ /hoʊm/

and moved into a one-room apartment above a bowling alley.

/ænd/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/ /ˈboʊlɪŋ/

That's it? That's the end of the story?

/ɪt/ /ɛnd/ /ˈstɔːri/

No, no, of course not. He died.

/noʊ/ /noʊ/ /kɔːrs/ /hiː/ /daɪd/

How does that help me?

/haʊ/ /dʌz/ /ðæt/ /hɛlp/ /miː/

How does any of this help me?

/haʊ/ /dʌz/ /ˈɛn.i/ /hɛlp/ /miː/

Can somebody, for God's sakes,

/kæn/ /ˈsʌm.bɒd.i/ /fɔːr/

please give me one piece of useful advice?

/pliːz/ /ɡɪv/ /miː/ /piːs/ /ˈjuːs.fəl/ /ədˈvaɪs/

Lily, control your woman.

/kənˈtroʊl/ /jʊr/ /ˈwʊm.ən/

The lesson of Blauman is that when your boss

/ˈlɛs.ən/ /ɪz/ /ðæt/ /wɛn/ /jʊr/ /bɔːs/

screams at you, you never scream back.

/juː/ /juː/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /skriːm/ /bæk/

That's why there's a little thing in corporate America

/waɪ/ /ˈlɪt.əl/ /θɪŋ/

I like to call the Chain of Screaming.

/laɪk/ /kɔːl/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/

- Chain of Screaming? - Yes.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/

The Chain of Screaming starts at the top.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /tɒp/

Arthur's boss's boss screams at Arthur's boss.

/bɔːs/ /bɔːs/

Arthur's boss screams at Arthur.

/bɔːs/

Arthur screams at you.

/juː/

You go home and scream at Lily.

/juː/ /ɡoʊ/ /hoʊm/ /ænd/ /skriːm/

Lily screams at one of the kids in her kindergarten class.

/kɪdz/ /hɜːr/ /ˈkɪndərɡɑːrtən/ /klæs/

Then that kid screams at her dad,

/ðɛn/ /ðæt/ /kɪd/ /hɜːr/ /dæd/

Arthur's boss's boss.

/bɔːs/

And the whole thing starts all over again,

/ænd/ /hoʊl/ /θɪŋ/ /ɔːl/ /ˈoʊ.vər/ /əˈɡɛn/

thus completing the Circle of Screaming.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/

I thought it was a Chain of Screaming.

/θɔːt/ /ɪt/ /wɒz/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/

It's a circle, Ted, I called it a circle.

/ɪt/

I don't scream at Lily.

/skriːm/

And I don't scream at my kids,

/ænd/ /skriːm/ /maɪ/ /kɪdz/

none of whom have parents who work at Marshall's firm.

/nʌn/ /hæv/ /ˈpɛərənts/ /huː/ /wɜːrk/

So it's not a circle.

Fine. You want it to be a Chain of Screaming,

/faɪn/ /juː/ /wɒnt/ /ɪt/ /biː/ /ˈskriːmɪŋ/

it's a chain of screaming.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/

I came up with the circle idea halfway through,

/ʌp/ /wɪð/ /aɪˈdɪ.ə/ /θruː/

cause I thought it was a more elegant metaphor,

/kɔːz/ /θɔːt/ /ɪt/ /wɒz/ /mɔːr/

but fine, ruin it!

/bʌt/ /faɪn/ /ˈruːɪn/ /ɪt/

You guys always undermine me

/juː/ /ɡaɪz/ /ˈɔːl.weɪz/ /miː/

when I'm trying to make a point, and I'm sick of it!

/wɛn/ /meɪk/ /pɔɪnt/ /ænd/ /sɪk/ /ɪt/

God, I'm surrounded by idiots!

Idiots!

See, doesn't everyone feel better now?

/siː/ /ˈɛv.ri.wʌn/ /fiːl/ /ˈbɛt.ər/ /naʊ/

Lily, I need your take on this. What...

/niːd/ /jʊr/ /teɪk/ /ɒn/ /wɒt/

what should I do?

/wɒt/ /ʃʊd/ /duː/

Well, what I teach my kids in kindergarten...

/wɛl/ /wɒt/ /tiːtʃ/ /maɪ/ /kɪdz/ /ˈkɪndərɡɑːrtən/

Oh, God.

...is, when dealing with a bully,

/ɪz/ /wɛn/ /wɪð/

the most important thing is to be constructive and positive.

/moʊst/ /ɪmˈpɔːr.tənt/ /θɪŋ/ /ɪz/ /biː/ /ænd/ /ˈpɒzɪtɪv/

- Hello, Arthur. - Hello, Marshall.

I have the Ninja Report right here.

/hæv/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/ /raɪt/ /hɪr/

But Arthur, in the future, if you want someone to do their best work,

/bʌt/ /ˈfjuː.tʃər/ /ɪf/ /juː/ /wɒnt/ /ˈsʌmwʌn/ /duː/ /ðɛr/ /bɛst/ /wɜːrk/

try to motivate them, not with fear and intimidation,

/traɪ/ /ðɛm/ /wɪð/ /fɪər/ /ænd/

but through encouragement, inspiration and respect.

/bʌt/ /θruː/ /ænd/ /rɪˈspɛkt/

Well said, Marshall, I... I needed to hear that.

/wɛl/ /sɛd/ /hɪr/ /ðæt/

By the way, I saw your wife's picture in your office.

/weɪ/ /sɔː/ /jʊr/ /ˈpɪk.tʃər/ /jʊr/ /ˈɒfɪs/

That is one tasty slice.

/ðæt/ /ɪz/

Oh, you're damn right.

/raɪt/

You know what I'm gonna do when I get home?

/juː/ /noʊ/ /wɒt/ /duː/ /wɛn/ /ɡɛt/ /hoʊm/

Oh, yeah.

I'm gonna rip that girl's clothes off...

/ðæt/ /kloʊðz/ /ɒf/

That's it.

/ɪt/

...just throw her on the bed...

/dʒʌst/ /θroʊ/ /hɜːr/ /ɒn/ /bɛd/

That's where she belongs.

/wɛr/ /ʃiː/

...and drive her home like a pack of sled dogs!

/ænd/ /draɪv/ /hɜːr/ /hoʊm/ /laɪk/ /dɒɡz/

It's bad, guys.

/bæd/ /ɡaɪz/

Mama needs it bad.

/ˈmɑːmə/ /ɪt/ /bæd/

You're right, baby, it's about respect.

/raɪt/ /ˈbeɪbi/ /əˈbaʊt/ /rɪˈspɛkt/

That is the first useful thing anyone's said to me tonight.

/ðæt/ /ɪz/ /fɜːrst/ /ˈjuːs.fəl/ /θɪŋ/ /sɛd/ /miː/ /təˈnaɪt/

Can you give me that speech again?

/kæn/ /juː/ /ɡɪv/ /miː/ /ðæt/ /spiːtʃ/ /əˈɡɛn/

I'm gonna drive her home like a pack of...

/draɪv/ /hɜːr/ /hoʊm/ /laɪk/

No, the other part, please.

/noʊ/ /ˈʌð.ər/ /pɑːrt/ /pliːz/

I have the Ninja Report right here, but...

/hæv/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/ /raɪt/ /hɪr/ /bʌt/

And it seemed like that was the end of it,

/ænd/ /ɪt/ /laɪk/ /ðæt/ /wɒz/ /ɛnd/ /ɪt/

but it wasn't, because the next night...

/bʌt/ /ɪt/ /bɪˈkɔːz/ /nɛkst/ /naɪt/

Which of these carpets would look better in the new apartment?

/wɪtʃ/ /ðiːz/ /wʊd/ /lʊk/ /ˈbɛt.ər/ /njuː/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/

I like the color of this one, but...

/laɪk/ /ˈkʌlər/ /bʌt/

this one's so soft. It would feel great on your bare feet...

/sɒft/ /ɪt/ /wʊd/ /fiːl/ /ɡreɪt/ /ɒn/ /jʊr/ /fiːt/

...or your bare back, a bead of eager sweat

/jʊr/ /bæk/ /ˈiːɡər/

rolling down your trembling bosom.

/daʊn/ /jʊr/

Lily, didn't we just go through this with bathroom tiles?

/wiː/ /dʒʌst/ /ɡoʊ/ /θruː/ /wɪð/ /ˈbæθruːm/

Shh, don't say my name.

/seɪ/ /maɪ/ /neɪm/

Lily can't know it's me. Just pretend you're talking to Stella.

/noʊ/ /miː/ /dʒʌst/

Be all lovey dovey.

/biː/ /ɔːl/

Hey, Stella.

Sweetie, how's it going?

/ˈswiːti/ /ɪt/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/

Not good, not good at all.

/ɡʊd/ /ɡʊd/ /ɔːl/

Where are you right now?

/wɛr/ /juː/ /raɪt/ /naʊ/

Right downstairs, come find me.

/raɪt/ /ˌdaʊnˈstɛrz/ /kʌm/ /faɪnd/ /miː/

Without Lily.

/wɪˈðaʊt/

Okay, I'll see you soon.

/siː/ /juː/ /suːn/

I love you.

/lʌv/ /juː/

I love you, too.

/lʌv/ /juː/

Wow, you two are already saying the "L" word, huh?

/juː/ /tuː/ /ɔːlˈrɛd.i/ /wɜːrd/

Apparently.

You hitting that?

/juː/ /ðæt/

- Oh, oh. - I'm in trouble, Ted.

/ˈtrʌbəl/

Ted, I'm freakin' out, man.

/aʊt/ /mæn/

It's a new car, so just be careful...

/njuː/ /kɑːr/ /dʒʌst/ /biː/ /ˈkɛr.fəl/

I did something stupid... can we just drive somewhere?

/dɪd/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /ˈstjuːpɪd/ /kæn/ /wiː/ /dʒʌst/ /draɪv/ /ˈsʌmwɛr/

I need to get away, just drive, man. Please just drive.

/niːd/ /ɡɛt/ /əˈweɪ/ /dʒʌst/ /draɪv/ /mæn/ /pliːz/ /dʒʌst/ /draɪv/

It's just, this is a really good parking spot.

/dʒʌst/ /ɪz/ /ˈrɪ.ə.li/ /ɡʊd/ /spɒt/

Dude!

Look, just tell me what happened first.

/lʊk/ /dʒʌst/ /tɛl/ /miː/ /wɒt/ /ˈhæpənd/ /fɜːrst/

Remember how I said I was gonna give that

/rɪˈmɛm.bər/ /haʊ/ /sɛd/ /wɒz/ /ɡɪv/ /ðæt/

big speech that Lily told me to give, be firm but respectful?

/bɪɡ/ /spiːtʃ/ /ðæt/ /toʊld/ /miː/ /ɡɪv/ /biː/ /bʌt/

Well, it didn't totally go that way.

/wɛl/ /ɪt/ /ˈtoʊtəli/ /ɡoʊ/ /ðæt/ /weɪ/

There is a lot of ketchup on that burger.

/ðɛr/ /ɪz/ /lɒt/ /ɒn/ /ðæt/ /ˈbɜːrɡər/

Sorry... what happened?

/ˈsɒr.i/ /wɒt/ /ˈhæpənd/

After we all finished talking last night,

/ˈæf.tər/ /wiː/ /ɔːl/ /ˈfɪnɪʃt/ /læst/ /naɪt/

I went to the diner to finish working on the Ninja Report.

/wɛnt/ /ˈfɪn.ɪʃ/ /ˈwɜːrkɪŋ/ /ɒn/ /rɪˈpɔːrt/

Hey, Marshall.

How long have you been sitting there?

/haʊ/ /lɔːŋ/ /hæv/ /juː/ /ðɛr/

If you go in there with Lily's kindergarten nonsense,

/ɪf/ /juː/ /ɡoʊ/ /ðɛr/ /wɪð/ /ˈkɪndərɡɑːrtən/

you're gonna get torn apart.

/ɡɛt/

I'm here to save your life. You hungry?

/hɪr/ /seɪv/ /jʊr/ /laɪf/ /juː/ /ˈhʌŋɡri/

- Yeah, I was just about to order. - What do you want ?

/wɒz/ /dʒʌst/ /əˈbaʊt/ /ˈɔːrdər/ /wɒt/ /duː/ /juː/ /wɒnt/

A BLT and gravy fries.

/ænd/

Okay, friends, what do you like?

/frɛndz/ /wɒt/ /duː/ /juː/ /laɪk/

A green tea with lemon for me,

/ɡriːn/ /wɪð/ /fɔːr/ /miː/

and for my friend here,

/ænd/ /fɔːr/ /maɪ/ /frɛnd/ /hɪr/

- the meatloaf, please. - Very good.

/pliːz/ /ˈvɛr.i/ /ɡʊd/

- No, I didn't want meatloaf. - Marshall,

/noʊ/ /wɒnt/

the Chain of Screaming is a real thing.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /ɪz/ /riːl/ /θɪŋ/

Arthur screamed at you, now you have to scream at someone else.

/juː/ /naʊ/ /juː/ /hæv/ /skriːm/ /ˈsʌmwʌn/ /ɛls/

- No, I don't. - Yes, you do,

/noʊ/ /juː/ /duː/

or else that anger is gonna eat you alive.

/ɛls/ /ðæt/ /ɪz/ /iːt/ /juː/ /əˈlaɪv/

Who would I even scream at?

/huː/ /wʊd/ /ˈiːvən/ /skriːm/

I don't know.

/noʊ/

How about somebody who's disappointed you?

/haʊ/ /əˈbaʊt/ /ˈsʌm.bɒd.i/ /juː/

Someone who's let you down.

/ˈsʌmwʌn/ /lɛt/ /juː/ /daʊn/

Someone who's gonna bring you meatloaf

/ˈsʌmwʌn/ /brɪŋ/ /juː/

when you explicitly ordered a BLT and gravy fries.

/wɛn/ /juː/ /ˈɔːrdərd/ /ænd/

No.

/noʊ/

I was just heading to the bar. What are you guys doing here ?

/wɒz/ /dʒʌst/ /bɑːr/ /wɒt/ /juː/ /ɡaɪz/ /hɪr/

I was just telling Ted a story.

/wɒz/ /dʒʌst/ /ˈstɔːri/

I like stories.

/laɪk/ /ˈstɔːriz/

You want a lick?

/juː/ /wɒnt/

What?

/wɒt/

Is that ice cream cone big enough?

/ɪz/ /ðæt/ /aɪs/ /kriːm/ /bɪɡ/ /ɪˈnʌf/

Uh, it's delicious enough.

/dɪˈlɪʃəs/ /ɪˈnʌf/

Okay, so... Then I say to barney...

/ðɛn/ /seɪ/

I'm not gonna scream at the waiter, Barney.

/skriːm/ /ˈweɪtər/

Yes, you are.

/juː/

That waiter is every boss and every bully

/ðæt/ /ˈweɪtər/ /ɪz/ /ˈɛv.ri/ /bɔːs/ /ænd/ /ˈɛv.ri/

who ever embarrassed or belittled you.

/huː/ /ˈɛv.ər/ /ɪmˈbærəst/ /juː/

And how dare he deny you the one thing that you want,

/ænd/ /haʊ/ /hiː/ /dɪˈnaɪ/ /juː/ /θɪŋ/ /ðæt/ /juː/ /wɒnt/

that would make you happy at this moment.

/ðæt/ /wʊd/ /meɪk/ /juː/ /ˈhæp.i/ /ˈmoʊmənt/

A BLT and gravy fries.

/ænd/

One green tea with lemon,

/ɡriːn/ /wɪð/

one meatloaf.

Enjoy, my friends.

/ɪnˈdʒɔɪ/ /maɪ/ /frɛndz/

Marshall. Marshall.

Excuse me?

/ɪkˈskjuːz/ /miː/

Yes?

This is not what I ordered.

/ɪz/ /wɒt/ /ˈɔːrdərd/

Yes, it is.

/ɪt/ /ɪz/

I beg your pardon, sir,

/jʊr/ /sɜːr/

but I ordered a BLT and gravy fries,

/bʌt/ /ˈɔːrdərd/ /ænd/

And as the customer, I'm always right, so...

/ænd/ /ˈɔːl.weɪz/ /raɪt/

No, no, I am not going to stand here and take this!

/noʊ/ /noʊ/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/ /stænd/ /hɪr/ /ænd/ /teɪk/

I am at the end of a triple shift, that's 18 hours!

/ɛnd/ /ʃɪft/ /ˈaʊərz/

And then I have to take two trains and a bus to Astoria

/ænd/ /ðɛn/ /hæv/ /teɪk/ /tuː/ /ænd/ /bʌs/

to have my wife scream at me because I'm never home.

/hæv/ /maɪ/ /waɪf/ /skriːm/ /miː/ /bɪˈkɔːz/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /hoʊm/

No, no, you eat your damn meatloaf!

/noʊ/ /noʊ/ /juː/ /iːt/ /jʊr/

Hey, what are you guys doing out here?

/wɒt/ /juː/ /ɡaɪz/ /aʊt/ /hɪr/

Oh sweet, can I get a toot?

/swiːt/ /kæn/ /ɡɛt/

Against car rules, this is against car rules!

/əˈɡɛnst/ /kɑːr/ /ɪz/ /əˈɡɛnst/ /kɑːr/

Oh, Ted, relax, it's Cuban.

/rɪˈlæks/

People pay to have their car smell like this.

/ˈpiː.pəl/ /peɪ/ /hæv/ /ðɛr/ /kɑːr/ /smɛl/ /laɪk/

Well, that's just not true.

/wɛl/ /dʒʌst/ /truː/

Oh, Marshall, switch seats with me.

/swɪtʃ/ /wɪð/ /miː/

- I called shotgun for all eternity. - You can't call shotgun for eternity.

/fɔːr/ /ɔːl/ /juː/ /kɔːl/ /fɔːr/

- Well, that's funny, cause I did! - It's case by case.

/wɛl/ /ˈfʌn.i/ /kɔːz/ /dɪd/

Guys, I'm telling a life-altering story here!

/ɡaɪz/ /ˈstɔːri/ /hɪr/

A 20% tip, really, for that waiter?

/ˈrɪ.ə.li/ /fɔːr/ /ðæt/ /ˈweɪtər/

I don't know, Barney, he worked a triple...

/noʊ/ /hiː/ /wɜːrkt/

- it just... - I can't believe... you know what ?

/ɪt/ /dʒʌst/ /bɪˈliːv/ /juː/ /noʊ/ /wɒt/

If you're not gonna yell at the waiter,

/ɪf/ /ˈweɪtər/

Yell at me.

/miː/

- What? - Yell at me.

/wɒt/ /miː/

I'm not gonna yell at you, Barney.

/juː/

What, you think you're gonna upset me?

/wɒt/ /juː/ /θɪŋk/ /ʌpˈsɛt/ /miː/

Please, give me your best shot.

/pliːz/ /ɡɪv/ /miː/ /jʊr/ /bɛst/ /ʃɒt/

Okay, fine, what, you want me to yell at you?

/faɪn/ /wɒt/ /juː/ /wɒnt/ /miː/ /juː/

This is me yelling at you, Barney.

/ɪz/ /miː/ /juː/

I'm sorry, I couldn't hear you over the sound of a butterfly

/ˈsɒr.i/ /hɪr/ /juː/ /ˈoʊ.vər/ /saʊnd/

landing on a leaf about three blocks away.

/ɒn/ /əˈbaʊt/ /θriː/ /əˈweɪ/

This is me yelling at you, Barney!

/ɪz/ /miː/ /juː/

Okay, you got some volume, now give me some content.

/juː/ /sʌm/ /naʊ/ /ɡɪv/ /miː/ /sʌm/

Make it hurt.

/meɪk/ /ɪt/ /hɜːrt/

You don't look as good in suits as you think you do!

/juː/ /lʊk/ /ɡʊd/ /juː/ /θɪŋk/ /juː/ /duː/

No, something that's true. Come on.

/noʊ/ /ˈsʌm.θɪŋ/ /truː/ /kʌm/ /ɒn/

The man made you cry. Make me cry.

/mæn/ /juː/ /kraɪ/ /meɪk/ /miː/ /kraɪ/

Your mom's a slut!

/jʊr/

Yes.

Your mom's a slut, and I'm sorry, Barney,

/jʊr/ /ænd/ /ˈsɒr.i/

but you and your brother clearly have different fathers,

/bʌt/ /juː/ /ænd/ /jʊr/ /ˈbrʌð.ər/ /ˈklɪərli/ /hæv/ /ˈdɪfrənt/

And you know why? It's probably because your mom is a slutty slut!

/ænd/ /juː/ /noʊ/ /waɪ/ /ˈprɒbəbli/ /bɪˈkɔːz/ /jʊr/ /mɒm/ /ɪz/

- Keep going. - I don't care what you say.

/kiːp/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/ /kɛr/ /wɒt/ /juː/ /seɪ/

Bob Barker is not your father!

/ɪz/ /jʊr/ /ˈfɑː.ðər/

Okay, now, well, that's just not cool.

/naʊ/ /wɛl/ /dʒʌst/ /kuːl/

Oh my Bod, Barney, I'm so sorry...

/maɪ/ /ˈsɒr.i/

No, I'm kidding... Keep going.

/noʊ/ /ˈkɪdɪŋ/ /kiːp/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/

Bob Barker's not your father!

/jʊr/ /ˈfɑː.ðər/

You've concocted this delusional idea that a game show host

/aɪˈdɪ.ə/ /ðæt/ /ɡeɪm/ /ʃoʊ/

Is your real father, and he's not!

/ɪz/ /jʊr/ /riːl/ /ˈfɑː.ðər/ /ænd/

You were abandoned, Barney!

/juː/ /wɜːr/

You were abandoned, and you never dealt with it,

/juː/ /wɜːr/ /ænd/ /juː/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /wɪð/ /ɪt/

and so now you never allow yourself to feel anything,

/ænd/ /naʊ/ /juː/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /əˈlaʊ/ /jɔːrˈsɛlf/ /fiːl/ /ˈɛn.i.θɪŋ/

and that's how you survive in this corporate world,

/ænd/ /haʊ/ /juː/ /sərˈvaɪv/ /wɜːrld/

and if I keep heading down this path, I'm gonna turn into you!

/ænd/ /ɪf/ /kiːp/ /daʊn/ /tɜːrn/ /juː/

And I don't want that!

/ænd/ /wɒnt/ /ðæt/

I don't want any of this!

/wɒnt/ /ˈɛn.i/

This is not why I became a lawyer.

/ɪz/ /waɪ/ /ˈlɔːjər/

This is not the person that I wanted to be.

/ɪz/ /ˈpɜːrsən/ /ðæt/ /biː/

I quit, Arthur!

/kwɪt/

I quit!

/kwɪt/

Well, thank you, Eriksen, I needed to hear that.

/wɛl/ /juː/ /hɪr/ /ðæt/

Really, 'cause I didn't mean to attack you personally, it's just that I...

/ˈrɪ.ə.li/ /kɔːz/ /miːn/ /əˈtæk/ /juː/ /dʒʌst/ /ðæt/

No, no, no, the part where you said, "I quit."

/noʊ/ /noʊ/ /noʊ/ /pɑːrt/ /wɛr/ /juː/ /sɛd/ /kwɪt/

Now we don't have to pay you a severance package.

/naʊ/ /wiː/ /hæv/ /peɪ/ /juː/ /ˈpækɪdʒ/

Uh, security's gonna rough you up a bit on the way out.

/rʌf/ /juː/ /ʌp/ /ɒn/ /weɪ/ /aʊt/

Robin, you dropped a little ice cream...

/juː/ /ˈlɪt.əl/ /aɪs/ /kriːm/

Dude!

I'm sorry.

/ˈsɒr.i/

Don't blame this on me, Marshall.

/bleɪm/ /ɒn/ /miː/

I told you to yell at someone beneath you.

/toʊld/ /juː/ /ˈsʌmwʌn/ /juː/

The Circle of Screaming is...

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /ɪz/

The Chain of Scr...

Pyramid, the Pyramid of Screaming!

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/

The Pyramid of Screaming.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/

How am I supposed to tell Lily?

/haʊ/ /səˈpoʊzd/ /tɛl/

She supported me through three years of law school,

/ʃiː/ /miː/ /θruː/ /θriː/ /lɔː/ /skuːl/

and now is the time when I'm supposed to pay her back.

/ænd/ /naʊ/ /ɪz/ /taɪm/ /wɛn/ /səˈpoʊzd/ /peɪ/ /hɜːr/ /bæk/

Now we're gonna lose the apartment.

/naʊ/ /luːz/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/

The place where we were gonna raise our children.

/pleɪs/ /wɛr/ /wiː/ /wɜːr/ /reɪz/ /aʊər/ /ˈtʃɪl.drən/

How am I supposed to tell the person who I love more than anything in this world

/haʊ/ /səˈpoʊzd/ /tɛl/ /ˈpɜːrsən/ /huː/ /lʌv/ /mɔːr/ /ðæn/ /ˈɛn.i.θɪŋ/ /wɜːrld/

that I've just thrown away our future?

/ðæt/ /dʒʌst/ /əˈweɪ/ /aʊər/ /ˈfjuː.tʃər/

Everybody out, everybody out of the new car! Out of the new car!

/ˈɛv.ri.bɒd.i/ /aʊt/ /ˈɛv.ri.bɒd.i/ /aʊt/ /njuː/ /kɑːr/ /aʊt/ /njuː/ /kɑːr/

Ted, screaming never solves anything.

/ˈskriːmɪŋ/ /ˈnɛv.ər/ /ˈɛn.i.θɪŋ/

And so Marshall finally had to tell Lily what happened.

/ænd/ /ˈfaɪnəli/ /hæd/ /tɛl/ /wɒt/ /ˈhæpənd/

I'm so sorry.

/ˈsɒr.i/

I just lost it.

/dʒʌst/ /lɒst/ /ɪt/

But I can fix it.

/bʌt/ /kæn/ /fɪks/ /ɪt/

First thing tomorrow, I'm gonna go in there on my hands and knees and...

/fɜːrst/ /θɪŋ/ /təˈmɒr.oʊ/ /ɡoʊ/ /ðɛr/ /ɒn/ /maɪ/ /hændz/ /ænd/ /ænd/

and beg for my job back.

/ænd/ /fɔːr/ /maɪ/ /dʒɒb/ /bæk/

No, you're not.

/noʊ/

What? Sao?

/wɒt/

Marshall, our future isn't money or an apartment.

/aʊər/ /ˈfjuː.tʃər/ /ˈmʌn.i/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/

And it's definitely not you being miserable at that horrible job.

/ænd/ /ˈdɛfɪnɪtli/ /juː/ /ðæt/ /ˈhɒrɪbl/ /dʒɒb/

I'm just happy to have my husband back.

/dʒʌst/ /ˈhæp.i/ /hæv/ /maɪ/ /ˈhʌzbənd/ /bæk/

We'll figure the rest out.

/rɛst/ /aʊt/

I love you.

/lʌv/ /juː/

I love you, too.

/lʌv/ /juː/

Ultimately, they were able to make ends meet

/ðeɪ/ /wɜːr/ /ˈeɪ.bəl/ /meɪk/ /miːt/

without going bust on the apartment.

/wɪˈðaʊt/ /ˈɡoʊ.ɪŋ/ /ɒn/ /əˈpɑːrtmənt/

- You sure about this? - Yeah.

/juː/ /ʃʊr/ /əˈbaʊt/

Who needs a car in New York City, right?

/huː/ /kɑːr/ /njuː/ /jɔːrk/ /ˈsɪt.i/ /raɪt/